|T in her apron|
Alex must have recorded one such Sunday morning because what he reproduced in his "stream of consciousness" post at his blog, FRAGMENTALS, is brilliantly accurate and therefore hilarious. I have guest-posted his blog entry below followed by the actual recipe. The really hilarious part is that I have trouble telling myself apart from the kids in the scene below.
|The waffle iron has a permanent home on the red tile trivet, we never seem to put it away except for pictures|
Sunday Morning Waffles - The Reprise - A Stream of Consciousness Conversation
What time is it?
I don't know
It's time to get up.
No it isn't.
Come on, I'm hungry.
The kid's are up. The sun is up. Make some breakfast.
You make breakfast!
Daaad! Make breakfast!!
Fine. Do you want cereal?
Waffles! Waffles! Waffles!
Do we have bacon?
Bacon! Bacon! Bacon!
I think so. You'll have to check.
Why don't you check!?
Dad! Don't be grouchy!
Fine. Help me up and go to the kitchen.
We need a measuring cup...that's a drinking cup, we need a measuring cup...No a measuring...I'll get it. This is a measuring cup. Get the bowl. The plastic one. Good, now hold it.
I wanted to!
You get the flour.
I wanted to get the flour!
Fine, you take the bowl, and you get the flour. Don't spill it. Careful, grab it by the...no don't!...Get the broom. How much is left? Let me see...There's enough, we only need two cups.
Can I scoop it?
I'll do it.
Why can't I?
You're holding the bowl. How about I scoop and you pour it in?
But I wanted to do that!
You pour the first cup, and you can pour the second. One...Two...Good...Now sweep up the floor please...The floor...I'll do it. Get the salt. Stop! Don't pour it in, we only need half a teaspoon. And a teaspoon and a half of baking powder. No not baking soda, the powder...in the can not the carton. Good.
What's it taste like.
Can I try some?
Hey! Don't let her eat that!
It tastes funny.
Did you find the bacon yet?
I haven't even looked, we just started. Okay 2 cups of flour, 1/2 teaspoon of salt, 1-1/2 teaspoons of baking powder, and now 1 teaspoon of cinnamon.
I'll get it!
No don't! The lid's not...on...Sweep it up please. There should be enough left in the jar. Fill up the teaspoon. Good, now put it in.
I wanted to do that!
You dumped most of the cinnamon on the floor! Clean it up.
Your Dad said clean it up. I don't think we have any bacon. Do we have sausages?
I don't know. Can you get a cup of water and a cup of milk and pour them in? I need a big spoon.
I have to wash my hands.
Fine, can you do it after you clean the floor?
I'm still holding the bowl!
Good, give it here. Get two eggs, the whisk, and another bowl.
Here's the water and the milk.
Good, pour it in. Carefully, not on my...It's ok just a little spilled. Stir the rest in until everything is smooth.
Dad how do I do the eggs?
Crack them on the bowl. Now pull out the shells... We need to separate the yolks. Like this.
Look Dad, I'm stirring!
Good, now stir in these yolks.
Take a fork and whip the egg whites until they're stiff.
Ha, ha. You said stiff.
Not funny girls. Stir a little more slowly, don't spill.
Are the sausages ready?
What sausages dear?
I asked you for sausages.
You what? When?...I didn't...I think we have some bacon, just wait. Is the dog outside?
Yes, he's barking.
Let him in please.
My arm hurts.
I'll finish the egg whites, you get a teaspoon of vanilla and two teaspoons of apple sauce.
Okay now what?
Put them in.
Why do we use applesauce?
It replaces the oil.
It just does.
The dog's barking at the neighbors.
Then let him in! Can you get the bacon out of the fridge?
Fine. Come. Inside. Now. Come, come on...he's not coming.
Come! Inside! Now! Good boy.
I think I'll shower.
Good idea, pass me the frying pan, I found the bacon. How many pieces?
All of it!
Two each then. The egg whites are done, fold them in and take out the waffle iron. I'll do the bacon.
I want to!
Okay just lay them out in the pan and use the spatter shield. Turn the element to medium.
Can I watch T.V.?
What? Who? You? Yeah, go ahead.
I'm helping you Dad!
That's great, thank-you. Is the waffle iron hot?
I need to plug it in.
Fine do that. Can you set the table too please?
Can I watch T.V.?
Sure. Tell your mother I'm making coffee. Do you want syrup or jam or what for the waffles?
All of them?
Butter and syrup then. Okay get out of here I'll let you know when everything's done.
Is it ready yet?
I thought you were showering?
I was, I am, I mean...I'm going to. How come no-one's helping you?
They did. How come you're not showering?
Fine I'm going. Give me a kiss.
Is breakfast ready?
It's just started cooking. Why aren't you two watching T.V.?
There's nothing on.
Set the table then.
And now the recipe... if you paid attention, you could almost find it in that post above.
Sunday Morning (A Waffle Recipe)
2 cups all purpose flour
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup water
1 cup milk
2 tablespoons apple sauce
1 teaspoon vanilla extract.
Using a large spoon mix the dry ingredients in a large bowl. Add the milk and water. Stir until the mixture has a creamy consistency. Separate the egg whites. Add the yolks and the apple sauce to the mixture. Mix well. Whisk the egg yolks until they are stiff. Fold them into the rest of the mixture.
Heat the waffle iron until it sizzles as you coat it with a small amount of butter. This will prevent the waffle from sticking. Pour the waffle mix into the waffle iron until it is about 3/4 full. Cook until golden brown. This mix should produce 4-5 waffles 8" in diameter.
Fragmentals is the writing blog of Alex Jackson. Fragmental is a geological term for pieces of rock found where they shouldn't usually be found. They are incomplete and do not blend in with the typical formations. These writing fragments are just that.
|Alex feeding K|